Oct 21, 2010

The COLD, the DARK, the SILENCE


I havent been so down so far in this company. Hypocrites, politics, fakers! I just want to get home, hug my mum and cry like a baby. This whole social issue taken out of context has taken its toll on me, besides the increased feeling of anxiety and loneliness. It is like being paranoid 24/7 and it is just a crap feeling definitely. I m so tired of being blamed for the mistakes done by others and useless after you'd put so much effort and hard-work on the projects, and this is tough for someone as socially awkward as me. Its meaningless holding back in the company if there is no one there to appreciate it. It is once again that period of time in life when you find out that maybe being by yourself is not always that best decision you have made. It actually make sense, you've to be a devil with 2 horns and 1 tail in order to survive in this spooky and creepy society that full of lies/fakers/hypocrite/backstabber/whatever shit. For all that I have work hard in what I have achieved, it all boils down to nothingness. Maybe I really just dont belong here nor anywhere.

I miss home, more than ever and I miss him (Pst! he's back, yes, he's finally back). Many people just do not realise what they are missing till they leave it for a long period of time. It is about the comfort levels that ensure peace in your life that actually hit you once you lost it thoroughly. Everytime people leave and return to your life, so much changes, that it scares me that I m not aware nor part of them. Maybe it is just time to re-evaluate my life. Or maybe I m just being a emo nemo bobo right now that I just want to be sad and accept sympathy. Whatever.

***

Tips : DO NOT GIVE YOUR CELLPHONE NO. TO ANYBODY EVEN THOUGH HE/SHE IS YOUR LONG LOST FRIEND.

FYI I met a guy last weekend and he starts being a annoying, irritating and maniac stalker. FML !

Will blog more once I've the time ;) as I am too addicted to Angry Birds in Halloween version ;)

- The END -


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